To Tell or Not to Tell, That is the Question
Posted by Luanne | Posted in Blah, Manic Monday | Posted on 30-06-2008
This weekend was a little crazy. Isn’t it funny how we think that when school is over, things will slow down a bit…wrong…we want so badly to enjoy summer that we book ourselves for twenty-million activities? In the end we just exhaust ourselves. Even vacationing is hard work anymore. Babble, babble, that is not even what I wanted to talk about. Anyway, this weekend was difficult in more ways than just a packed schedule. It was hard on my heart and heavy on my soul.
I found out something about a friends child that could not be ignored. I had to, for the sake of the child and the parents find out the truth of the matter and let the child’s parents in on it. It is hard enough to love a friend, love their child, and find out the child is in trouble, but to have to break the parent’s heart….well, it sucks. There is no other way to say it. Nobody likes to be bearer of bad news, or stir up trouble, or be the snitch. The truth is, the easiest thing is usually not the better thing. It was also hard because I want the child to trust me enough to come to me when he/she is in trouble. I don’t want to be the person who tells, I want to be the person who they know will walk beside them and help them on their way. I thought about it and prayed about it and in this instance; I knew I had to tell the parents.
As a parent, I want to know. I want to know if my children are in trouble or need help. Believe it or not, there are parents who don’t want to know. Ignorance is bliss, even at the expense of the child. There are parents who don’t want to punish or deal with a child’s issues just because they don’t want to be the “bad guy.” It is more important that their child likes them than it is for them to correctly love their child which includes being unliked sometimes. Take the risk…don’t make parenting about you. Know that being a parent is a God given gift of serious responsibility. It is not to be taken lightly or used for selfish appeasement of our own insecurities. Love your children enough and your friends enough to tell them the truth and not waver from it. Accountability is hard to take sometimes, but it sure is a safe place to be.
Sorry to be such a Debbie Downer (if your name is Debbie…sorry), but I just wanted to share and see what you guys have to say about it all.
I am so sorry you had to go through such a thing…but yet admire you for caring enough to make the right choice. Children are our future and someone has to be the hero in these situations and lead them by the hand and hopefully make an imprint on their lives that they shall reflect on the next time a choice with a life altering consequence faces them again… as for as the parent(s), perhaps they were truly oblivious to this and perhaps they were sticking their heads in the sand… either way, again maybe it took you to be their hero also and going forward they shall reflect on this and now realize what a precious gift they have been given and they need to protect them and love them at all costs…I say great job and I pray that it turned out all okay in the end.
You did the right thing! I hope you will do that one day for me if it is necessary!! (But I hope it isn’t!)
I think you did the right thing. As a parent I would definitely want to know if one of my kids were doing something they had no business doing!
Mindy
Wow. What a crappy deal for everyone. I know you did the right thing. And as hard as it might be to hear as a parent, you gave some good insight and advice. Thanks for sharing that with everyone.